Wednesday, March 12, 2008

the flu and talks with God

It's amazing how the flu can cloud your head and you forget what wellness felt like once.

I thought I had run a head of the flu this year, barely escaped it, and then it caught me by the tip of my toe and felled me.

I don't suppose sleep is so sweet until that first good rest on the night we are well. I have been contemplating rest and what that means. . . in every sense. Mind... body . . .soul . . .(spirit) There is a giving up to do for it.

We forget about that. We want to demand for rest. Originally we come to the table, with two fists, in a kind of picket, with grievances. We barter. We deserve it. Then we beg. Finally we give in. Then we get it after-all.

I suppose I got sick in order to rest. I just didn't know it. I sleep and sleep. I have to. But my mind has to slow down too, and my expectations.

I think God is saying, "What are you thinking? Have you been trying to out do me?"

And I'm saying, " I guess I have..."

and he's just laughing... not in a mean way... just laughing because he knows this is my schtick. Just wave of the hand, and a chuckle that goes along with that kind of laugh, until I come to my senses. We're just walking. Just walking.

He says, "I'm in no hurry with you.'

And I'm saying... "I'm beginning to figure that out."

And He says, like he's got all day, "Okay, let's go."

So I get up, pick up my stuff to get ready, and he says,

"No, just leave that. . ."