trying for the best

Sometimes when you have an opinion, or make an observation... even an incredibly obvious one, you can be crucified for it (socially I mean). Sometimes physically, but not usually, of course, at least not in my country.

You can get maligned.

You have to ask yourself the important question, in those cases. If you can save a person, (or persons) from potential damage, you should try to do it, even if it costs you dearly. Even if its unpopular. Even if the discomfort of the pointing out the obvious will target you for revenge of the inner guilt you rouse in others.

Trying for the best isn't easy or safe. I'm not perfect. I've made mistakes. Like Eve, I been deceived by a serpent or two. In learning from those mistakes I hope to save some lambs from the jaws of some wolves, even wolves in sheep's clothing if that's the case, if at all possible.

This use to really surprise me, even depress me how hard it was to do well, or better. It does not surprise me any more. It's hardest among people you would hope it would be easiest. There you have it!

Spiritual formation is a journey. We have to try to for the best. When we fail we have to keep trying. I FAIL. I must press on.

Disappearing . . .

When I was young sometimes I would get the sense that if I closed my eyes I might completely disappear. I might not just sink into the floor or fade like a vapor-though sometimes I wondered that too-but maybe I wouldn't exist because I was not existing. Was I there if I felt invisible and unnoticed? Was it possible to disappear? Does this speak in some way of how a child absorbs things that are less than loving-neglectful things; or is this more of creativity and how one imagines and gets use to one's metaphysics?

Remembering that, and the potential adult manifestations of those sorts of topics, gets me to thinking about love. It seems it can bring us back, to life. It can make us reappear, maybe something like clapping for Tinkerbell could bring her back to fairy-ness.

But too, I think that disappeared person has to be able to feel that love first too. Those perceptions cannot be too deadened. If one's been under the ice too long and gotten too numb, a quick warm up does not "do the trick". Then the cut off has been too great, though a thaw can happen, rescuers must be patient.

How do we make people reappear?

Loneliness and Love

Loneliness will drive us to do unwise things.

Love will drive us to do very unwise things.

Does it seems a great many people don't take the care to tell of which one is driving them?

The former will condition seems to rarely settle down into one that begins out of the latter condition (love).

The latter condition keeps the former condition from happening at all.

If it weren't for the great gap, and horrifying feeling and condition (both) of loneliness, could we not love so much better and more wholly?

possessing nothing

In reading Tozer, I have enjoyed his take on this "possessing nothing" issue. It can encompass a worldview.

Tozer (in the Pursuit of God) says, "I have everything, but I possess nothing." If this is the perspective, nothing possesses us. We are not "other possessed", but have no chain to anything, and then can be given, or shall we say, released, to God.

I think the image here isn't that of apathy toward things. We may care quite deeply, and engage fully, love fully, even lay our lives down for friends and enemies. The difference I see is that we do not clutch anything.

So, I may love my child, my spouse, my friend, with all my heart, but I know that God gave them to me. They are God's, not mine to clutch. I possess nothing. (I don't contend I have this mastered, but only that I'm beginning to understand this as working as such!)

Your comments are welcome!

Porcupine Traits

Porcupines are SOLITARY creatures.
They live ALONE. They are not like other rodents like mice or squirrels who live together in colonies.

Their spiny quills dislodge into anything they touch and can cause agony, infection, and even death.

With these qualities we would think they would be extinict long ago. But actually they flourish very well.

How?

Simply put, porcupines DANCE.

They flatten their pain inducing quills and two-step.

That's right, dance! It's a delicate balancing act to make things work out, when you have the ability to hurt others.

On cold nights they have even been known to snuggle down together in what is termed as "a prickle".

If these barbed creatures can overcome their prickly tendencies, we humans can learn to get along.

We can be agreeable even when we disagree.

We are porcupines too, but we can all learn to flatten our quills and dance.

SLR camera collection

My husband and I have accumulated 4 SLR cameras at this point. It's funny to be sitting on all this old technology. They are worth very little on ebay.

We both had to buy them during our years in college for Photography class. Tim was given two that belonged to his grandmother. we thought of selling them to get a cheap digital, but they will hardly cover the expense.

I've always loved taking B&W shots with my camera. Our current digital just doesn't do it for me. It's bulky too.

I think the best scenario might be to get a small pocket sized digital, a nice digital SLR, and keep one of the traditional SLRs.

But the big thing is we're rather poor to consider such luxuries, so these are dreams, for now.

un-spooky

Success-

The kids had fun for Halloween. Meaning: After about 20 houses we could be done. It's not a big deal at our house--not hushed up, nor hyped. We carve two pumpkins about a week prior, roast seeds (YUM) and then throw together costumes from the costume bin about 15 min before it's time to go. That's about all the thought and prep. that goes into the night.

Other potential spooky situations seemed averted and turned out positively. Very relieved.

the next crazy thing will be....

the whacky ELECTION! ugh.